Lesson #2

Lesson #2 – Leave your baggage at home

I always find it funny when I hear parents say that they are sending their child for tryouts just so they can have some extra ice time or we just want them to have the experience and just want to see how they compare to the other players. The best line is when they say, it really doesn’t matter to us if they make it or not! Who pays for a tryout and puts their kid into a stressful situation just to get on the ice? If you want to have extra ice time, why don’t you go to the rec centre for a free skate? Safe to say it matters to you.

Believe me, I was no different but let me tell you what I have learned. I learned that when my son played house league in comparison to more competitive levels, the lessons he learned about teamwork, following rules, and life skills were the same. The times we tried to push him to play at a level he wasn’t ready for was to his detriment and it made a horrible experience for all of us. Please hear me when I say that you are wrong if you think that the only ultimate experience in hockey is if your child is playing at an elite level. The love of the game, the time with your child, and the lessons they learn happen at every level. If you make them feel that they are inadequate because they don’t play at a higher level, they’ll spend the whole experience feeling like a failure. This is what the chapter and the lesson “Leave your baggage at home” is all about. If you have any sense of shame around what level your child plays at, you have to ask yourself why. Don’t make your young player feel like a failure when they are doing their best and playing where they belong.

One of the toughest parts of creating the video series was hearing some of my son's comments about the way I managed the hockey experience as a mom. When he said, "It didn't take me long to discover headphones. I had to do the best I could before games or tryouts or anything nerve-wracking to try to block my mom out." It was a difficult pill to swallow because at the time, I didn't realize the stress I was causing him. I wanted him to play well so I could hold my head up as if it was my own accomplishment.

From that experience, I wrote lesson two (2), Leave your baggage at home. This excerpt from the book says it best:

"Sometimes we need to ask ourselves when we've yelled at our kids in the rink, who are we really yelling for? If they don't have a good game, who are we embarrassed for? I bet if you think long and hard, the answer is that you're yelling because you don't want people to look at you like you aren't aware that your son or daughter just messed up. I hate to say it, but like everything else, our egos get in the way. This is our child's experience, not our own. It's amazing the freedom that comes from stepping back. I say this having yelled, paced, made excuses and left many games feeling worse than my son did. Whenever I made the experience about me and tried to protect him from what I had gone through, it would feel way worse than it had to."

At the end of the day, leave your baggage at home! The only baggage your child should bring to the rink is their hockey bag!

Click here for video - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vBVtrRdK-l0

Written by Allyson Tufts

Author, Speaker and Passionate Hockey Mom

Stay tuned for the next video in the series that covers the lesson "Parents see hockey through a different set of eyes."

To learn more about the series or to purchase your copy of the book go to www.lessonsfrombehindtheglass.com

This article is the property of Allyson Tufts and is not to be used without her permission.

23rd Annual Atlantic Challenge Cup Wrap-Up

Media Release
October 8, 2018

23rd Annual Atlantic Challenge Cup Wrap-Up

 Moncton, NB - The 23rd Anniversary of the Atlantic Challenge Cup concluded this afternoon in Moncton, New Brunswick and it was another tremendous success.  The event had everything that a hockey fan would want to see and all games were very well attended by parents, the general public and a large number of scouts who took in games over the four days.

“This was another display of the talent which Atlantic Canada has to offer to the hockey world," stated Louis Gaudet, Host Committee Chairperson.  "It was a great weekend of hockey for Atlantic Canada and it showed the type of talent that we have in our region.  Our players keep raising the bar each year and it is a sign that there are a lot of great things happening in the four Atlantic hockey branches.”

Listed below are the Gold, Silver, and Bronze medalists in each of the four divisions:

Male U14:

Gold – New Brunswick

Silver – Prince Edward Island

Bronze – Nova Scotia

Male U15:

Gold – Nova Scotia

Silver – New Brunswick

Bronze – Newfoundland Labrador

Female U16:

Gold – New Brunswick

Silver – Nova Scotia

Bronze – Prince Edward Island

Female U18:

Gold – Nova Scotia

Silver – Newfoundland Labrador

Bronze – New Brunswick

Results from the event are available at www.atlanticchallengecup.ca

After the Medal Games on Monday afternoon the Hard Hat Awards were awarded to a player from each team which is determined by his/her teammates to be the player that has the most positive attitude, greatest work ethic and is a teammate of whom all are proud to be associated.   The winners are as follows:

Hockey New Brunswick

Male Under 14 – Mathieu Pelletier
Male Under 15 – Noah Gibbs
Female Under 16 – Genevieve Hache
Female Under 18 – Shani Rossignol

Hockey Newfoundland and Labrador

Male Under 14 – Landen Toole
Male Under 15 – Riley Mercer
Female Under 16 – Jordan Chaulk
Female Under 18 – Kaylee Hurley

Hockey Nova Scotia

Male Under 14 – Spencer Bower
Male Under 15 – Brandon Abbass
Female Under 16 – Sara Stewart
Female Under 18 – Maggy Burbridge

Hockey Prince Edward Island 

Male Under 14 – Harry Clements
Male Under 15 – Colby Huggan
Female Under 16 – Caroline Thompson
Female Under 18 – Rory Aiken

For More Information:

Mike Gillingham
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Wednesday Oct 3rd, 2018


MONCTON, NB – 330 young hockey players from throughout Atlantic Canada will converge on Moncton’s Superior Propane Centre on Friday for the four day Atlantic Challenge Cup.

This is the 23rd Anniversary of the Atlantic Challenge Cup which is billed as Atlantic Canada’s High Performance Hockey Championship.

The Atlantic Challenge Cup will bring together the top players, while representing their provinces in the male U14 and U15 categories, along with the female U16 and U18 categories. The teams were selected from each of their respective provincial summer evaluation camps.

Players attending the Atlantic Challenge Cup will come from all corners of our region, which truly makes this an Atlantic Canadian event.

“We are certainly pleased and honored to be able to host these exceptional athletes in the City of Moncton,” said Community Lead Louis Gaudet. “Everyone coming to the City of Moncton will be treated in a first class manner. The event organizers and our volunteers have put a lot of time into ensuring that every detail has been looked after and these athletes are in for a great experience.”

Bell Aliant and the four Atlantic Hockey Branches are pleased to announce that family members, friends, and fans unable to attend the event will be able to watch all of the tournament games on the live webcasts, courtesy of Bell Aliant. The live webcasts will be available by going to the official tournament website www.atlanticchallengecup.ca and latest scores, schedules, rosters and news can be found there as well as the Atlantic Challenge Cup Facebook and Twitter page.

Over the years, the Atlantic Challenge Cup has featured the likes of Sidney Crosby, Sean Couturier, Luke Adam, Brandon Gormley, Nathan MacKinnon, Jillian Saulnier, Sarah Davis, Sarah MacDonnell and Shannon MacAulay.

To view the schedule, rosters, standings and statistics visit the official tournament website – wwww.atlanticchallengecup.ca

For More Information:

Mike Gillingham                                    Or                                Matt Vautour

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September 27, 2018

Fredericton, NB – Hockey New Brunswick will have 26 players attending a Canada Games Pre-Event in Dartmouth, NS in hopes of securing a spot on the New Brunswick Canada Winter Games Team.

Team New Brunswick will be competing in the Canada Games Pre-Event from September 27th-29th in Dartmouth, NS where all games will be held at the Dartmouth 4 Pad. Weekend Schedule - click here

New Brunswick will be competing against the provincial teams from Nova Scotia, PEI, Newfoundland and Labrador.

“We are very excited to have our players together in Dartmouth to compete against the other Atlantic Provinces. It will be a great test for our players and staff as we continue our selection process for Canada Winter Games in Red Deer.”– Head Coach Phil Richer

A complete listing of players and staff follows below:

Team New Brunswick – Under 16


Lucas Burrows
Pierre-Vincent Guignard
Nic Sheehan


Eli Barnett
Jonathan Desrosiers
MacLaren Dick
Jack Dickie
Keegan Hunt
Connor LeBlanc
Simon Maltais
Evan Nause


Frederick Caissie
Alex Cormier
Alexi Daniel
David Doucet
Yanic Duplessis
Drew Elliott
Alex Ferguson
Cole Fraser
Cole Huckins
Charlie Jackson
Dominic LeBlanc
Carter McCluskey
Josh Nadeau
Jake Parker
Peter Reynolds

Head Coach – Phil Richer
Assistant Coach - Eric Neilson
Assistant Coach – Kevin Pottle
Goalie Coach – Kirk Gormley
Trainers – Mike Burrell & Jessica Sears
Director of Operations – Norbert Laforge

Video #1

Lesson #1 – Don’t force your passion, your child will find their own

I hope everyone enjoys the first video in the Lessons from Behind the Glass video series. Don't force your passion, your child will find their own was one of the greatest lessons for me. Unfortunately, it was one I had to keep learning as we moved through the hockey years.

During filming, my son told me he hated the car rides home after his games. His comments surprised me; I honestly would have never pegged us as the parents that made the car rides home difficult. When he said, "You barely let me get in the car before you started asking me about the game," I knew he was right and it made me realize that although we didn't yell at him after games and always stayed calm, it didn't matter. It was all our questions and our need to know every detail that put so much unnecessary pressure on him.

During my visit to Hockey New Brunswick, I was asked my thoughts on parents who expect too much of their son or daughter on the ice. I will tell you that I’m ashamed to say that I was one of them.  Looking back, my best advice would be, “Don’t make every conversation about hockey!”  I used to start talking about his games the night before.  I’d tell him he needed a good snack before bed so he’d have a good sleep and be well rested for his game the next day. As soon as he woke up in the morning I’d be making his breakfast reminding him how important good nutrition is. I’d tell him I wanted to have lots of energy between the pipes and then he got to listen to me all the way to the rink.  As I said before, I wasn’t yelling at him but the constant chatter about hockey made him realize how important the whole thing was to me.  When our kids see that we want it more than they do, it’s far too much pressure for a child.

One of the most thought-provoking interviews was in in the video for Lesson #1. When we spoke to coach Leland Mack about parents expecting too much from their son or daughter, he said, “They just feel so much internal pressure, they have enough pressure from their coach but then you can see them sometimes looking at their parents or they’re worried about that car ride home. When their season ends, or their hockey career ends, they all say that damaged their relationship with their parents.  I’ve seen it over and over again where kids say, “Some games I play because I hate my Dad that day or my Mom.”  As parents I don’t think any of us set out to have our kids hate us. 

So, I guess my advice would be this, tell them to do their absolute best and then know that their best will get them where they belong. If hockey isn't going to be your child's passion, make sure you enjoy watching them figure out what makes them jump out of bed in the morning. What I've realized more than anything, is that my relationship with my son was far more important than my passion for the game. Don’t force your passion, your child will find their own.

Video - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGaLH8YChhg&t=17s

Written by Allyson Tufts

Author, Speaker, and Passionate Hockey Mom

Stay tuned for next week’s video, “Leave your baggage at home”

For more information on the series or to purchase the book, go to www.lessonsfrombehindtheglass.com.

This article is the property of Allyson Tufts and is not to be used without her permission.